Tuesday, 8 February 2011

Sucking a Negro

Spotted this un-PC product in the local Coop. It's a bag of licorice from Serbia. Of course it just means "black" because licorice is after all, black duhhhh..... but somehow I feel the name just won't pass muster in the Anglosphere.

The man on the packet cover, of obvious Caucasian descent, is a chimney sweep, a job entailing getting covered in soot and ending up blackened in the course of work, hence the obvious brand-product linkage. Nevertheless, despite the total lack of reference to anything African related, any product marketing remotely approaching this in the west is almost certain to generate howls of outrage. I'm old enough to remember the original "Darkie" toothpaste packaging (a popular brand in SE Asia) before it evolved into "Darlie". Oops, that's it, I've committed a thoughtcrime by implying that progressing from a blackface minstrel to a quasi-caucasian is an example of evolution into a higher form ;-) In this case, the name change followed protests from western pressure groups to the parent company.

A metamorphosis pre-dating Michael Jackson's
The sweets themselves are rather tasty (although licorice isn't normally my candy of choice. I confess to buying them just for this blog post).

Indeterminate filling (I don't know any Serbian and the list of ingredients is in Cyrillic anyway)
I whipped one out!
Gingerly I placed the rigid, oblong Negro on the tip of my tongue. As it slowly moistened I took it into my mouth, savouring the feel of it like a welcome intruder into my moist orifice. Gradually, as my excitement mounted, I began sucking harder and harder and greedier and greedier until suddenly, it burst open, spilling its load and flooding my mouth with its exquisite white, creaminess.

Yeah, it was quite good.

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